Step 9 - Talk differently
Have you ever noticed how when some people speak, the room becomes silent and everyone listens?
Speech is a powerful thing, and thinking consciously about the way you bring your message across will help you immensely in dealing with other people. Some basic principles apply, regardless of whom you’re talking to, what you’re trying to say and how much time you’ve got to say it.
What to talk about?
Avoid the seven deadly sins of speaking, as discussed by Julian Treasure in the Ted talk on the right.
Nobody really likes to listen to someone who’s constantly either gossiping, judging, being negative, complaining, making excuses, exaggerating and stuck in dogmatism, or in other words, confusing opinion with fact. It’s difficult never to complain, never to exaggerate or gossip, but actively doing everything you can to do less of it, will only have a positive influence on the way others think about you.
Now what should you talk about then?
Four things are always right to keep in mind when talking to others: honesty, authenticity, integrity and love. Be true to yourself, wish others well and make sure you always stand behind what you have to say.
How to talk?
Take a look, or rather have a listen, at the Ted talk on the right by Julian Treasure. Julian explain, in a way we can’t put in writing, the most important ‘tools’ for speaking. The part about ‘How to talk’ starts at 4:20, but we really recommend you watch the full video, absolutely worth it.
My biggest challenge is ‘speed’. I tend to talk too fast when I’m enthusiastic - quite eye-opening to hear Julian explain the difference between talking too fast and speaking at just the right pace.